IVF on Mars

If men are from Mars, (and I’m quite certain mine is), then I need some help prepping my Martian for IVF.

It goes without saying that I have read, researched, discussed, and viewed just about everything out there to get me mentally prepared for IVF (and of course I am still searching for more). I understand the enormity of what we are about to embark upon. R doesn’t have the slightest clue, and this makes me nervous for a few reasons:

1. He might get overwhelmed at our 2 hour orientation this coming Tuesday and have a mini meltdown.

2. He may think I am being dramatic or exaggerating about effects of the hormones.

3. He may not fathom what I am going through during and after the retrieval, and therefore may not offer as much support as I might need (emotional and physical).

I am not a needy person by any means, but I’m worried he just thinks this is like going in for an IUI. My concerns are 100% selfish, but I think in this case I am entitled.

So I guess my question is, are there any ways to prep the Martians for IVF and really help them fully comprehend the scope of the treatments and procedures? How have your husbands / significant others dealt with IVF? Any tips or stories you have are greatly appreciated!!!

7 thoughts on “IVF on Mars

  1. My Martian was kinda disconnected through our iuis. It was like he didn’t get it although he wanted to? With IVF, he saw the daily injections, my bruised stomach, the surgery prep, the cost…he realized this was a big effing deal. We also had a lot of transparency about what was going on with the embryos and eggs retrieved so he was able to be more involved in the process than with my IUIs. Having my Martian attend the IVF prep and injection class was big – he saw first hand how intense it was and connected more to what I was going through. He watched me take my shots, etc. It was a nice change to have him more engaged. Good luck with your first IVF meeting…it felt like I just took the SATs over again! It was great but intense; take notes.

  2. We’ve been through a year of clomid and 2 rounds of IVF (but the second one was just a ER…OHSS happened so we’re waiting for a FET now. We’ve got 6 blasts in the freezer đŸ™‚ ). Hubbies are all different. Mine really wanted to do the injections but I just couldn’t. He came to every appointment with me which I think really helps them get a grasp of what’s going on. Speak in really simple terms to them. LOL. I don’t entirely mean to sound like they’re dummies but putting things into context for him, letting him know how I was feeling, helped him stay aware that even on the days that I didn’t say much, there was still a lot going on inside my body. Does your clinic have you go see a psychologist as part of your info session? With the first clinic we went to, it was mandatory. I didn’t want to go but it definitely helped us.

    • Yeah, I hear ya; I try to tell him just enough without freaking him out! The euphemisms are abundant (i.e. ” please clean your pipes between now and Saturday…”). Mine is very sensitive about all things involving sex. We don’t have to see a psychologist but we do see a counselor once a week for general marital health anyway. Our doctor’s office does offer a support group but it’s not local, so hopefully our regular counselor will be enough. We go tomorrow afternoon after our orientation, so I am sure we will have a lot to sort through! Thanks for your input!

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