When Your Body Doesn’t Cooperate…

URGH! I need some help, fellow TTCers. I’m in a little bit of a dark place. Now, it should be noted that while I do visit dark places, I never stay for long, but still… frustration is setting in.

I’ve been quiet this month. We’ve been ridiculously busy. So busy that I had to go “au natural” this cycle. I didn’t put any stock in this cycle because we were stressed, not using meds, and (gasp!) having actual sex instead of IUI.

It was actually quite refreshing. I didn’t obsess over my two week wait at all and that hasn’t happened in over a year. Nonetheless, my body is revolting and playing tricks on me and NOT COOPERATING. I have had brown tinted CM sice my estimated 6dpo. I was 100% certain period was imminent last night at 10dpo. Today is 11dpo and I have been on and off crampy, convinced AF had arrived several times… Only to find more BROWN. I had bright red last night during one bathroom trip and a tiny bit this AM and now it’s gone.

So here’s the deal, I’m SURE AF will be here sometime tomorrow but I called in my new cycle to the doc today and now I have to wait. And it is a holiday weekend so I don’t think they will even be open for my CD2, 3, or 4. I’m just hating my uncooperative reproductive system right now. I know you’ve all been there.

Can someone please enlighten me as to the medical reasons why I might be experiencing what I am experiencing this month? Google is my enemy.

Also, I totally backed my car into a parked car at Starbucks yesterday morning. Just thought I would throw that in for good measure. But Libra horoscope says things will change soon. So I will find some hope in that. :/

I hate to be a downer. But I’m down…

Wherefore Art Thou?

SOOOOO frustrating to wait, and wait…and wait for your period.

I KNOW she is coming… I have had dull to moderate cramps on and off since Tuesday night (it is now Friday – period due date!), accompanied by light spotting of watery fresh blood.  At around 5 this AM, I woke up with worse cramps and was sure *she* was here.  Ran to the bathroom – only more spotting.

According to some of the reading I’ve done, if I didn’t ovulate during this past cycle, then I may be spotting due to lack of progesterone.  This has happened to me once before during this calendar year, with the days and days of spotting, but I don’t remember the cramps. Hubs still wants me to test if my period is a no show today.  It’s a cute thought that he is still positive.  It’s so obviously our first month trying.  (Of course, he doesn’t know I have already gone through six internet cheapies that came free with my OPK strips).  I know today is the first day that is actually viable for me to test, but woman’s intuition… not preggo.

Figures there just had to be some abnormalities during TTC month #1, right?  Most months, I am pretty regular with maybe one day of light spotting if anything.  I just want to get my stupid period already so we can move onto the next cycle.  URGH!